How to Become a Better Person Inside & Out - 10+ Simple Ways
|A better person. Photo: KnowInsiders|
Life is a constant exercise in self-improvement. And while some of that focus lands squarely on becoming more educated or rising in the ranks of the workplace, sometimes we forget to improve how we treat ourselves and those around us. It’s normal to feel like you could be doing more when it comes to self-improvement. But being a better person doesn’t involve being overly hard on yourself. In fact, it’s quite the opposite.
The question now is, how do you become a better person inside and out? This is a very vital process of growth in the quest to become better and constantly improving yourself amidst the struggle, chaos, setbacks, disappointments, and several experiences we encounter. In the rush to achieve, the idea of being "better" can become lost to ambition and selfishness. The journey to improving your soul and your compassion toward yourself and others begins.
After having a truthful self-assessment, your next step is to make attainable goals for yourself. At this point, you are pointing on the direction you want to go. In the case of personal development, you need to know what type of person do you really want to become.
This involves asking so many questions such as: Do I want to be compassionate? Should I quit my unproductive habits in order to become a better person? Should I change the way I treat other’s opinions or understand other’s behavior towards me? Do I want to be a more religious person and serve the community to I belong to?
These questions may help you determine the path that you should take to achieve your goal of becoming a better person.
If it helps, write them down on a piece of paper, or better yet, start a journal. This will open up your introspective side, and allow you to better understand yourself from an objective standpoint.
Journaling needs to be an active, reflective activity. Simply writing down random thoughts is not likely to be very helpful. Instead, write about situations you encounter, how they made you feel at the time, how you reacted, how you felt about them later, and what you think you could do differently.
Here are some questions to get you started: Is there a particular relationship with a loved one that you would like to improve? Would you like to become more philanthropic? Do you want to do more for the environment? Do you want to learn how to be a better spouse or partner?
Be Willing to Admit Ignorance, So You Can Learn
Very few people seem to be comfortable with admitting that they don’t know something. Maybe they feel that admitting ignorance about a subject will make them seem stupid, so they’ll feign knowledge and attempt to go with the flow in any given situation. This is highly detrimental on many counts, from a person being seen as an insufferable know-it-all, to projects going awry because an employee claimed to know something they didn’t.
If you don’t know something, admit to your lack of knowledge, and then immerse yourself in the subject so that you familiarize yourself with it. The universe is full of things that we don’t know, but the only way to grow and change is to open ourselves to opportunities to learn… and those won’t come about if we don’t leave space for them by saying “I know” to everything.
2. Appreciate what you currently have
People often lose sight of the things around them and that causes them to turn in on themselves from time to time. It’s human nature to overlook the things we currently have and to feel dissatisfied of it due to having obtained it. It therefore becomes imperative to remind ourselves that what we currently have is a blessing, and to write about that daily.
Attempting to grow without initially appreciating what we have will often always lead to dissatisfaction in the future due to lack of focus. Find appreciation in the things you have and in the life you currently lead. This will make it easier to grow, and will change the focus on growing to improve for the sake of improving and not just to obtain more and better things.
Choosing the Right Path
Explore your talents. Everybody has a skill or interest that they excel in and genuinely enjoy. If you don't think you have a talent, you probably just haven't found it yet.Be patient, but not lazy. You can't be good at everything, so don't give up just because you have failed once or twice. Instead, be proactive and try new things until you find something you love and are good at.
Enroll in a class you're interested in, or pick up a new instrument or sport. Choose things that sound appealing to you; this way you are more likely to stick with it.
3. Be Willing To Change
This is very key in knowing how to be a better person. Like the saying goes “change is constant.” Logically, you would not be seeking to be a better person if you had everything perfect.
The yearn to be a better person stems from the fact that you have some parts of your life not smooth enough. And until you admit that, you will never be a better person. Also, it is not enough to admit that you are not the best version of yourself, you must be willing to change.
In your bid to be a better person, you will have to eschew some habits and welcome newer ones. This will require you to have an open mind. When you have an open mind and you are willing to change, you will definitely make progress in your journey to becoming a better person.
You would not know the beauty of experiencing something new until you actually open yourself to newer opportunities. Learn to be open to change and watch yourself become a better person.
4. Let Go of Anger
We all experience anger in our lives. Uncontrolled anger, however, can create problems in our relationships and even with our health.1 All of this can lead to more stress and additional problems, complicating life and keeping us from being our best selves. That's why learning to manage and eventually let go of anger is so important to becoming a better person.
Letting go of anger isn't always easy. But the first step is learning more about recognizing anger and knowing what to do when you feel angry in your life.
Recognizing anger is often simple if you make an effort to notice when you feel upset and decide to manage this feeling rather than denying it or lashing out at others as a way of coping. Focus on noticing when you feel angry and why, and know that there is a difference between feeling angry and acting on that anger. Then, know your options.
|You can change your beliefs about what is making you angry. This can work by learning more about the situation, or even reminding yourself there may be things you don't know yet. |
Remind yourself that maybe that person who cut you off in traffic was distracted by something challenging in their own life. If a friend seems to be rude to you, inquire about how their day is going and find out if there's more that you don't know.
You can also focus on what your "anger triggers" are, and eliminate them as possible. For example, if you find yourself becoming frustrated and angry when you have to rush, work on making more space in your schedule (even if it means saying "no" a little more), and try to eliminate that trigger. If a certain person makes you angry, try to limit their role in your life, if it doesn't work to talk things out with them first.
|Stay hungry, Stay Foolish |
Steve Jobs’ famous commencement speech ended with this phrase. The phrase is an encouragement to keep learning and pushing yourself to do better things, while also keeping an open mind to try new things, and make mistakes. But as long as you stay wanting more, stay active, and stay looking for answers in your life without settling, you are on your way to being a better human being.
5. Be Respectful and Develop empathy
How would you feel if you had just cleaned your home and someone came in and tracked mud everywhere? You'd probably be a little ticked that they hadn't taken off their shoes. Take this mentality and apply it to everyday life.
For example, don't toss your trash or cigarette butts on the floor of public restrooms or sidewalks just because someone else will clean it up. Be respectful of others' time, thoughts, ideas, lifestyles, feelings, work, and everything else. You don't have to agree with any of it, but people have a right to their opinions and yours is not necessarily correct.
Empathy is the process of understanding others by putting yourself in other’s experiences. The beauty of having the ability to walk in somebody’s shoes is that it will help you discover and understand other’s pain, fear, and broken dreams.
The whole process of developing empathy also widens your perspective on how people should be treated and not be judged quickly. Remember that your outer world is your mirror. What you don’t want to see in that mirror is what you don’t want to experience in your own reality.
6. Stop Making Excuses
Blaming your spouse, boss, or clients is fruitless and won't get you very far. Instead of pointing fingers and making excuses about why you aren't happy or successful in your personal or professional life, own your mistakes and learn from them. When you do this, you will become a better person.
There is no excuse for being mediocre. When I started blogging, I would blame everyone but myself for mistakes. To me, I would never have a fault.
If you want to become a better person, you need to learn how to stop making excuses. When you have mastered the art of not making excuses, you will start seeing every task you are given as a means of showing that you are indeed a better person.
|Do Something You Don’t Want To |
Keeping an open mind and trying things that you wouldn’t normally do is a very easy way to become a better person. Take a risk and challenge yourself to try something you’ve always been scared to do.
7. Get to Know Different People
In many cities around the world, libraries participate in a “human library” project: folks from all backgrounds and walks of life volunteer a few hours of their time, and you can take the opportunity to sit down and chat with them for a little while. You may have never had the chance to chat with a Buddhist monk, a lesbian single mother, a Wiccan priestess, a police officer, an Imam from your local mosque, an ex gang member, or a person who has been disfigured in a fire or accident, but by sitting down and chatting with them (especially in an environment where no question is considered “stupid”), you can have the opportunity to connect on a very human level and move past any preconceptions or prejudices.
If your city doesn’t have one of these libraries, consider taking the time to seek out those whom you have always been curious about—you may discover that they are far more open to chatting with you than you’d expected. We all like to be understood and respected for who we are, and open dialogues are so conducive to greater compassion and acceptance of differences.
8. Give a Hand - Support Others
It’s hard when you are in a rush or squeezed inside the metro to be gracious. But a little smile goes a long way. Smiling at strangers especially in the morning makes the day brighter for everyone.
|Photo: Inc. Magazine|
Helping others may seem like an obvious route to becoming a better person. We often think of "good people" as those who are willing to sacrifice for others. This, in the minds of many, is what makes a person "good." However, good deeds can also make us better people because of the connection between altruism and emotional well-being.
According to research, it just may be true that it's better to give than to receive. So while you may feel too stressed and busy to extend help to others when it's not absolutely necessary, expanding your ability to focus on the needs of others can really help you as well. It’s true: Altruism is its own reward and can actually help you relieve stress.
In addition to making the world a better place, exercising your altruism can make you a happier, more compassionate person. Because there are so many ways to express altruism, this is a simple route to being a better person, one that is available to all of us every day.
|Studies show that a little help you give to others can entirely change your emotion. It will make you happy. This is the reason why many people donate a portion of their fortune to a charity they want to help.|
9. Think Before You Speak
The fastest way to prevent hurting other people is to think of the ramifications of your words. More people are beaten down by words than fists. Do you really need to say something hurtful? How would you feel if it were said to you or about you?
Are you using honesty as an excuse to say something hurtful? When you’re hurt, does it really help you to lash out with your own hurtful expressions? Many of the wisest and most considerate people in the world are thought to be that way because they don’t impulsively speak. They allow themselves time to think first.
If you don't understand why one country is invading another, take the time to educate yourself on the current event. Ask a person intimately connected with the event for his or her thoughts. Remember, we're all interconnected, and being aware of different cultures, different people, and what their lives are like can make you a more well-rounded individual. This will also help you understand points of view different from your own.
10.Follow what you love
Whatever you do, make sure that you love it. Successful people really love what they do. The journey to success in business or in personal development is painful and challenging. So if you don’t love what you do, you will quit sooner before even reaching half-way of your goal.
So before you start walking in the path towards your goal, ask yourself if you really want it. Do you really want to be a person you want to be? If you are not sure, then maybe you need time to think about it.
Many people do what others want them to do not what they really want to do. As a result, they don’t enjoy the process. And the worse thing is that they hardly succeeded in their goal. In fact, most people who are not passionate about what they do fail in their ultimate goal.
Recognize Your Weaknesses
Addressing your weaknesses is a huge step toward becoming a better person, but remember, the goal isn’t to be perfect. It’s the striving to improve that makes us better people.
Without being overly self-critical, make a list of your weaknesses. Note ways to strengthen those weaknesses when you have time. Focus on one at a time and create specific strategies for improvement. For example, if you tend to overwork, set aside time to relax and play. This will improve your attitude and your health.
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