For Success: Don't Try to Play A Good Man to Please Everyone
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You Cannot Please Everyone, Unless You Want To Fail |
Don't try to play the good guy and give others a chance to bully you
It is an obvious fact that if you are too gentle, it is easy to be despised and bullied by others. But remember, you can't bully anyone, but don't give others a chance to bully you.
What if you always played the role of a "good person", not turning down anything? But what happens when you refuse someone else?
For many people, saying "No" is not easy. Some early childhood education has taught us that saying "No" seems to have caused a lot of pain to others.
Therefore, a "good person culture" has been formed that is deeply ingrained in the subconscious of many people. Although there are many ways to define a "good person", many people agree that the person who never refuses to ask or ask for someone else's request is a "good person".
Because, we are used to pleasing others, living is to please everyone, but rejection is synonymous with hurt.
The ancients said, "A good horse will be ridden by others, and a good man will be helped by others". Being a good person, living an honest life is not a bad thing, but being too good is a disease.
When you are too easy-going, no matter what others say, you will not disagree. Gradually, your words are not respected, when you become difficult, you will be immediately shamed. It's not playing the good guy, it's an expression of weakness.
You always help others when they are in trouble, you do everything for them, sometimes people will remember you. But if you keep helping them, they will only become dependent, waiting for you to do everything, once you stop helping, people will hold grudges and think you are petty.
So why do you keep trying to play the good guy?
Be a person, don't be too easy, don't try to play a good person, be a wise person who knows when you should help and say what to do so as not to turn yourself into someone who deserves to be looked down upon.
Think carefully before answering other people's requests for help, don't take things that are out of your reach.
Don't try to act like a good person just because you're afraid to say no
A study has shown that people who like to please others are easily hidden in the pressure of submission in social communication.
The truth is, in life, it is perfectly normal to decline invitations from friends or decline requests at work that are not under your responsibility.
While having to say no can be uncomfortable, in the long run, you're helping yourself. Only when you refuse to do those things will you never be made to do things that are not your duty.
The reason we don't dare to say "no" is because it feels awkward to say this word. Many people since childhood could not bear the disappointment of others with them, subconsciously they formed the thought that they always wanted everyone around to like them.
In the company, they try to work to please their superiors and colleagues; After returning home, work hard at home to make loved ones satisfied...
But do you ever feel really tired, even feel sorry for yourself and angry, wondering why being a "good person" is so difficult?
Therefore, many people always act as good people just because they are afraid to refuse before other people's requests.
In fact, human-to-human relationships, no matter how close, have limits. Everyone has their own principles and obligations, no one can help.
In the family, each person has their own place.
At work, each person will have their own duties.
In society, each person has his or her own responsibilities.
Maturity is when you do your job well, perform your role well, not exceed your own position and duty to assume the obligations of others. That is not called being a good person, but called embracing, allowing others to take advantage of you.
Remember, for things that cause you to violate your own principles, you should and should dare to say "no". Rejection is the right thing to do then.
Rest assured that the people who really think for you, will never make unreasonable offers to harm you. Only petty people would want to harm you with such outrageous demands.
Don't try to be a good person just because you want to be loved
It's obvious, but few people realize, that trying to be nice to everyone doesn't actually make us more likable.
No one has the power to make the whole world like him, just like we can't like everyone in this world. So the only way is to happily accept it.
"Joyfully accept" here is not that we accept that the other person hates us or accept that others will hurt us at will, but that we accept that loving or liking is the freedom of each person.
We can't control what other people think, but what we can control is our emotions. Don't waste your time getting upset or angry over people who are not important to your life.
Besides, being a good person or not is decided by ourselves, but don't try to show it out or be "blindly good" to others.
The more you show it, the more you try to prove it, the more people think you're fake. And "blind good" only makes others take advantage, command, and despise you. At that point, you will feel frustrated because the things you are not recognized.
That's not to say that you're a "bad person". In fact, sometimes being the "bad guy" to turn down other people's offers when needed, will help you gain more respect.
Life is inherently a lot of trouble, the best way to live is to just be a good person enough, a good person who thinks right, is good in moderation, good to himself, to his family, to those around him and to those around him. strange, as long as the other side is worthy of your kindness.
If you are a good person, people who understand things will notice, and haters will always only scrutinize. There are loans and repayments in this life, the law of cause and effect does not leave anyone out.
When our soul is at peace, doing kind things, becoming a good person, a good person, a useful person, we ourselves feel happy. Thanks to that, life also becomes more radiant and colorful. Isn't that what we want?
Just let things happen naturally, good things will spread on their own, gradually, without you or anyone to say, everyone will respect and love you.
Don't try to play a good person just to please everyone, nor do you need to be sad or angry because others don't like you.
Other people don't like you, don't understand you, that's okay, those people don't represent the whole world, why should you care so much? The important thing is that you just keep being a good person with your thoughts so that you have nothing to be ashamed of and love yourself.
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