The Reasons That Women Cheat Are Not As Simple As Men Think
Why do women with happy families still cheat? |
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Many Women Have A Happy Family But Still Cheat
Men's old assumptions about women's ability to cheat are becoming increasingly untrue.
Secret surveys have shown that 85% of men and 81% of women confess to having at least one affair in their lives.
Those who are in a happy family will not be able to imagine that the actual number of infidelity in both men and women far exceeds the numbers we think.
The old assumption that men were more likely to cheat is becoming increasingly untrue.
"Traditionally, it has been argued that women are more likely to cheat than men because they are dissatisfied with their existing relationships, while men are more likely to cheat than women because they are seeking sexual gratification or taking advantage of an available opportunity," said Zhana Vrangalova, professor of human sexuality at New York University, USA.
Main Causes Leading to Women's Adultery
The reason why men cheat is often to follow fashion, to love strange things... but the reason why women cheat is not so simple.
Some of the main causes leading to women's adultery are the lack of love in their marriage, women's dissatisfaction with their married sex life, and their husband's unfaithfulness leading to women's desire for revenge. love fades, conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law make the couple's feelings dented, husbands are heartless, busy doing business, do not pay attention to their wives' feelings, women feel no longer valuable in their husband's eyes, they have the tendency to want to rely on another man who feels their full worth.
The moments of weakness that cause women to commit adultery are not many, but in fact it still happens. This explains why happily married women still cheat because they are also tempted by things that cannot be ignored. Just a minute of relaxation, a few seconds of weakness and a few wobbly, fluttering moments if there are complicit circumstances such as a long business trip, long absence from husband... .
"Sometimes it's for natural reasons, it can be emotional. But even if we don't want to admit it, women do cheat when given the opportunity. There is a lot of data showing that women will cheat with co-workers and said, 'I'm very happy with my marriage. But I see an opportunity, I'll take advantage,'" Alicia M. Walker, associate professor of sociology at Missouri State University, USA, said.
Men will be completely surprised to know, the fact that women cheat mostly due to lack of love rather than sex. However, there are also many women who are candid about why they cheat, discussing sexual compatibility and preferences.
"We don't want to think that women are just as sexually desirable and like to have sex with multiple partners. But in reality, they're just as bored with sex in marriage as men are," the associate professor of sociology said. Walker, said.
None of the adulterous women chose to cheat easily. After years of trying to improve their marriage, they decided to seek relief elsewhere.
But that doesn't mean that adulterous women are always looking for ways to save their primary relationship.
Charlynn Ruan, a clinical psychologist and founder of Thrive Psychology Group, says: "One of the main reasons women cheat is to break up and end a relationship that makes them feel deadlock in some way.
Often they have a husband who seems like a nice person, but is controlling, stuffy, or emotionless. And the woman, after trying to take remedial measures, resorted to adultery as a way to end the marriage.
This is often accompanied by a lot of guilt, Dr. Ruan adds. "He's a nice guy, but I'm heartbroken. There's something wrong with me." So they act to end the relationship.
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Top 4 Unexpected Reasons for Women Cheat More and More
A report from the Kinsey Institute, Indiana University shows that, for the first time in modern history, women are cheating at nearly the same rate as men.
A study published in 2013 also found that while the percentage of men admitting to infidelity has remained stable over the past two decades, the percentage of women who cheat has increased to 40%.
Gary Spivak, founder of dating site FidelityDating, a site usually for ex-cuckins, revealed that last year the majority of its members were women but just a year later it was 50/50 split between the two. gender.
According to experts, there are several reasons for this change. The Internet makes finding good partners easier than ever. In economic terms, women are becoming more and more in charge, helping them feel free, no longer passive to men. A 2015 study out of the University of Connecticut found that while the burden of the family breadwinner increases infidelity in men, it increases infidelity in women.
A recent study also found that some women have the infidelity gene, while men don't. This study shows that 38% of women cheating is due to genetics.
According to Dr. Helen Fisher, author of the book Anatomy of love: A natural history of mating, marriage, and why we stray, says: "The gender gap in infidelity has closed. Women today are no longer valued. the value of a husband and wife, but more aware of all the needs that need to be met. This means that when they are no longer satisfied, they will find another place that feels suitable."
1.Women commit adultery for sexual motives
Women commit adultery for sexual motives |
Dr. Alicia Walker, an assistant professor of sociology at Missouri State University, spent a year interviewing women who had had an extramarital relationship, and the results showed that women believed that if they continued their marriage, If their sexual needs are not met, they will have to break up with their partner.
None of the adulterous women chose to cheat easily. After years of trying to improve their marriage, they decided to seek relief elsewhere.
Sex and relationship therapist Dr. Kerner says that today, women and men are equal not only economically, but also in household chores and childcare. Women have grown to believe that they "can and should 'have it all', no longer needing to pretend in the bedroom". "Women today feel less pressure to have sex in a bad relationship. My female clients have wondered why they used to have to pretend to have an orgasm," Kerner says.
Lauren, 41, admits she wants all "best friend, one partner, equality, lover". Although she has a child and a husband, she still has outside partners. The first person she slept with was a fellow guy who gave her more equality, even though his income was lower than her husband's.
2.Women cheat because they are not satisfied with their current relationship
The same study found that another top reason women cheat is falling out of love with their current partner. Even if the love is still there, when they are unhappy in their marriage, they may be more inclined to cheat.
No matter what the reason: anger, financial problems, family troubles... these all cause boredom at home, so women are easily distracted, tempted to cheat outside.
3.New people make women feel special
Sometimes women cheat because someone new has made them feel special or made them feel like a different person. Women believe that having an affair helps them feel attractive, noticed, and appreciated no matter where they are or what they do.
4.They are less responsible for adultery and are less socially condemned
While women who cheat are increasingly equal to men, they are actually less responsible for it than in the past. Kara, 33, the head of a media company in Texas, filed for divorce from her husband three months after her affair was discovered. When her husband, a civil engineer, learned that his wife was having an affair, he informed the parents of both sides. "Sorry, I have to announce a fact. My wife slept with my family's pediatrician," Kara recounts what her husband did. However, he begged not to divorce, but she insisted.
A study in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior also found that when women cheat, they are less socially condemned than before. As was the case with Lauren above, when she told her husband she cheated, she thought he would keep it a secret but he told everyone. "I think if you were the cheater, you'd be treated a lot worse," she said. Instead, most of her friends seemed sympathetic.
Adultery to Get Revenge on HusbandMore than half of those who cheated for revenge said they didn't hide it, in order to ultimately make their partner experience what they've been through. Infidelity can happen for a variety of reasons, and according to a survey from IllicitEncounters, a dating site for married people looking to change their mind, the main reason people have an affair is to get married. revenge. "They didn't intend to cheat, but felt it was fair to do so because their partner had already cheated on them," said Christian Grant, the website's representative. The site's survey of 1,000 people also found that "eating pho" in retaliation was more common among women than men, accounting for 37% of women surveyed, while this figure was 31% among men. More than half of those who cheated for revenge said they didn't hide it, in order to ultimately make their partner experience what they've been through. Eight out of 10 of these people said that they did not feel any remorse or guilt towards their partner and even talked about the act themselves.
However, in reality this is a foolish act of women. When you are feeling extremely shocked and heartbroken over being betrayed, you may think that "eating spring rolls" for revenge is acceptable. But in anger, we often fail to make the wisest decisions. The fact that you have an affair to get revenge on your husband can be used as evidence against you. Your husband may even force you to forgive him because you are now "even". "Eating spring rolls" for revenge will make your traitor less guilty with his actions and require you to understand and sympathize. Infidelity won't help ease your pain. It will only make you angry and bitter in return. Revenge of any kind rarely brings peace. Especially "eating spring rolls" for revenge may help you feel less miserable in the short term, but it will add to the pain in the long run. Revenge in this way does not help in dealing with emotions or planning to overcome or overcome the situation. In addition, taking revenge by "he eats cha, grandma eats spring rolls" will reduce the chances of marriage healing. If you feel that this marriage is still salvageable, don't think about "eating spring rolls" for revenge. To create a chance for reconciliation, you need to address the root of the problem. |
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